When I was single, people wanted to overshare info about
their love lives with me all the time, because as a single girl, I would “get
it.” If they wanted to bitch about their significant other, I would get it,
because as a single girl I must know what crap other people can be sometimes.
If they wanted to glow about how awesomely amazing their partner was, I would
get it, because as a single girl that kind of loving relationship must be what
I was longing for. If they wanted to gripe about their dating woes, I would get
it, because as a single girl I was right there with them.
And, my general lack of interest in being embroiled in
other’s personal dramas notwithstanding, this was generally true. Being single
meant I could relate to the good, the bad, and the ugly about other people’s
relationships.
But once I found myself in a committed relationship, I lost
what I’ve come to refer to as my “single girl cred.” Once people learned that I
was no longer going home every night to an empty apartment to undoubtedly eat
raw cookie dough by the pound and obsessively check my OKCupid inbox (you know,
like all single people do…), it was apparently determined that I would no
longer “get it,” as I am now no longer regaled with overly personal romantic
tales of any nature.
Which, for the most part, is fine. It’s none of my business
anyway, and again, I don’t feed off of drama (I feed off of raw cookie dough,
because old habits die hard). But it still feels strange to overhear a coworker
lamenting about her latest lame duck dating experience to someone, and
commenting as I walk past, “Oh, you got lucky; you don’t get it.”
And my immediate reaction is to try to get my single girl
cred back. I don’t get it? It took me 34 years to finally get lucky in love! You think I don’t get lackluster first dates, or the
frustration over the seemingly lack of suitable partners in the world? You
think I don’t get wanting someone who doesn’t want you back, or trying to
politely shake someone who is way more invested in your short-lived romance
than you are? You think I don’t get hanging onto to someone for way longer than
you should for reasons you’ll never fully understand? You think I don’t get
nights spent alone, or being the third wheel with your best friend who can’t
socialize without her boyfriend in tow, or waiting for some guy who you know
isn’t “the one” to call/text/email? You think I don’t get wanting to punch
every happy person in the face because why should they have what you don’t?
I still get it, and I always will. I may not be a single
girl anymore, but my cred is still strong. Now pass the raw cookie dough.
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