A Guide for the Hopelessly Unphotogenic
Remus and I are both average-looking people; definitely not
traffic-stopping gorgeous, but I don’t think anyone has ever been repulsed by
either of our physical appearances. Yet for some reason, getting either of us
to take a halfway decent photo is a struggle. Awkward smiles, stiff postures,
ill-timed blinks, unflattering angles, and hair having a mind of its own are
all common themes in our photos, both when posing alone or together (the fact
that neither of us can smile on command without looking like a serial killer
doesn’t help, either). Which is why when we first started shopping for a
wedding photographer and the idea of doing an engagement session came up my
initial reaction was:
I accepted the need to have our wedding day photographed,
naturally, but the thought of engagement photos was horrifying. At the wedding
there would be other things to do/worry about and plenty of people around to
distract us from whatever the photographer would be doing, so I wasn’t
particularly concerned about that day. Plus, all those extra bodies around
meant there were more people to potentially have embarrassingly bad photos
taken of them, so even if all the bride and groom shots came out poorly, we
could still laugh at “the weird face your aunt is making here” or “what in the
hell is my father doing in this shot?”.
But then I started thinking—and reading—about wedding
planning and all its elements, and began to wonder if maybe having a set of
professionally-taken photos of just the two of us not dressed in our wedding
finery would be something we’d like to have. We could use them for our “save
the date” cards and potentially in other parts of the wedding process, and at
the very least always have a good Facebook profile photo. I would also be a
time for us to meet our photographer before all the hullabaloo of the wedding
day and let them get to know us (and how awkward we were likely to be to work
with), as well as be a trial run for their services. If I came out looking like
a deranged hunchback in the engagement photos, I would know we needed to hire a
different photog for the wedding. And perhaps get me fitted for a back brace.
And as I looked over the portfolios of the photographers we
were considering, I saw a continuous stream of engagement photos of couples who
weren’t supermodels, but still looked great in their photos. That could be us! I thought. We could be a nice-enough looking couple
smiling naturally at each other in front of some pretty backdrop!
When we found a photographer we both liked and she offered
us a decent deal on an engagement session and wedding day package, I asked
Remus if he would ignore my earlier declaration of “no way in hell are we doing
engagement photos” and submit to the photo shoot, and he happily agreed (or
said “um…I mean, I guess, if you really want to…,” but my memory’s fuzzy).
We were both a little apprehensive on engagement shoot day,
and I’m not going to deny it felt really weird having a photographer follow us
around and encourage us to “act natural!” when there’s absolutely nothing
natural about having a photographer follow you around. But when she sent us the
photos several weeks later, I was amazed at how well they came out. I had been
hoping for maybe half a dozen usable photos, but she provided more than 100
shots that I wasn’t at all embarrassed by my appearance in, making me
infinitely glad that we took the leap to do an engagement session, and
solidifying that we chose our wedding photographer well (a big relief because I
had no idea how I’d go about firing a photog if I had to).
So below are some potentially helpful/potentially pointless
tips for other hopelessly unphotogenic people on how to take good engagement
photos.
- Wear your own clothes.
If you’re already uncomfortable
being photographed, don’t double-down on the awkward factor by wearing an
outfit you’re uncomfortable in or unfamiliar with; now is not the time test
drive that Rent the Runway dress you think might possibly maybe look good on
you.
- Choose a setting that suits you.
While looking at photographer
portfolios I saw engagement photos of couples lounging in an open field,
holding hands while skipping through a forest, snuggling up in a camping tent
in broad daylight, and playing peek-a-boo around a sculpture (you know…like you
do…). Remus and I were doing none of this nonsense. If we were going to be
photographed, we were going to be photographed where we were comfortable, doing
things we actually do. So our first location was a bar. A very nice, ornate bar
that was the setting for our very first meeting. We also chose some outdoor
sites around Chicago—hoping our January photo shoot would allow for some
outdoor shots—like the bridge we regularly cross when heading downtown and in
front of the Chicago Theatre, an iconic landmark from the place where we live.
Every location we hit were places we’ve been to multiple times before, so there
was no environmental unfamiliarity to deal with.
- Think of things to talk to each other about before the shoot.
Part of the ludicrous “act
natural!” instruction of being photographed involved us trying to ignore the
camera and simply interact with each other. While this worked some of the time,
most of the time we were simply talking about how awkward we felt being
photographed. If I had to do it all over again, I would come up with
conversation topics or stories to share beforehand, so when we were told to
“act natural!” we’d have things to naturally chat about.
- Be prepared to make out in front of a stranger. A lot.
On our way home after our
engagement session ended, Remus commented, “I think that’s the most we’ve ever
made out in front of another person,” and he was right. Having photos of you
kissing is inevitable in engagement and wedding shoots, so just find a way to
deal with it. We got complimentary champagne from the bar that was our first location,
which helped, so maybe try that.
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