Wednesday, May 25, 2016

Observant ≠ Nosy

While Remus is a rather generous and thoughtful gift-giver, he is kind of crap at maintaining the element of surprise that often accompanies giving gifts. Not being huge on surprises, this doesn’t bother me much, but as one who likes to think he’s a 007-level smooth operator, it infuriates him to no end, and has even led to me being accused of being nosy and prying. To which I have to say: No. I am not nosy, I am observant, and there is a world of difference between the two.

A nosy person goes searching for information. They’ll scroll through your text messages and look up your browser history at birthday and Christmas times in hopes of uncovering what you have in store for them. They’ll rifle through your wallet and pockets looking for receipts and question your friends and family about possible gift conversations that may have been had. They’ll dig in your dresser drawers, under the bed, and in the backs of closets looking for any hints they can find.

An observant person notices things as they occur. They’ll notice you showering, putting in contact lenses, and grabbing a spritz of cologne 10 minutes before they leave for a manicure appointment on a day where you supposedly aren’t doing anything, which always translates to pajamas all day, glasses instead of contacts, and a shower right before bed if they’re lucky. They’ll pick up the empty plastic bag you tossed on the floor in order to use it in the future as a trash can liner and spot the $400 receipt you left in there. While sober, they’ll listen to your drunken ramblings after your company party and hear things that you still don’t remember you revealed.

I would never employ the desperate tactics of a nosy person, but I am observant as fuck. So if the element of surprise is that important, time to step up your game, Mr. Bond.

No comments:

Post a Comment